This post is inspired by the Fray's cover of "Heartless" I just heard and the amount of alcohol I've had tonight.
When I was 23, I had what I would consider my first serious relationship. Without getting into all the details, we were kind of off and on for a period, some of my own doing, some of it hers. Despite my age, at the time I was a very inexperienced lover and was new to dating. Anyway, after this back and forth, I wanted to do what it took to make it work this time around. At the time I still had the key to her place, so while she was in school, I essentially broke in and cleaned up her entire apartment, did her laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, and then organized a maze for her. Once she opened the door I had flowers leading to various parts of the apartment, with a note at each one, sharing different memories we had together, and then ultimately the final room which had a note that said "whenever you are ready, we can make new memories of us" with a disposable camera underneath the note. I wasn't there when it happened, but she called me right after ecstatic about everything and the possibiliy of us getting back together. But this is where the story turns. Despite her enthusiasm, turns out that night she went out to a party and got high off heroin and ended up sleeping with another guy. If that happened to me now, it would be bye in heart beat. But at that time in my life, she was the one girl who always got to me. Doesn't matter what she did, I always forgave her. Embarrassing to admit, but it didn't end there. She popped in and out of my life for the next 7 years. It literally took 7 years and all the things that happened until I finally had closure. But it finally happened. If I saw her tomorrow I'd still be nice her, but I could never feel the same. I hope she is happy now, but as the line in the song goes:
"You wait a couple 'years' and you gon' see,
You'll never find nobody better than me.