00:20:00:Um...it could be some massive|traumatic experience that happens.
00:20:06:Um...it could be some tiny moment,|er...a fragment of a moment,
00:20:12:and in some way that's really what|the process of songwriting is for me.
00:20:16:It's the retelling of these stories|and the mythologizing of these stories.
00:20:22:To lose the faculty of memory|is a massive trauma
00:20:26:within that world, obviously.
00:20:28:(PIANO PLAYING)
00:20:31:NICK: Yes, is it worth pursuing?|Will I just come back and...
00:20:33:(PIANO PLAYING)
00:20:35:OK, I'll do...I'll do one more.
00:20:37:(PIANO PLAYING)
00:20:42:# Childhood days
00:20:45:# Shimmer in a haze
00:20:52:# Give us a kiss
00:20:58:# In the blue room|you whispered into the music
00:21:02:# And the brown field under the thorn bush
00:21:07:# Give us a kiss
00:21:13:# And then across the overpass and down
00:21:17:# By the blood factory and into town
00:21:22:# Give us a kiss
00:21:28:# Just one little sip, sip, sip
00:21:31:# Before you slip, slip, slip away
00:21:37:# Again
00:21:42:# You are still hanging out in my dreams
00:21:48:# In your sister's shoes
00:21:52:# In your blue jeans
00:21:57:#Ah, give us a kiss
00:22:02:# One little sip, sip, sip
00:22:06:# Before I catch, catch, catch on fire
00:22:12:# Come on
00:22:15:# And give us
00:22:19:# A kiss
00:22:36:# Want me to burn
00:22:40:# I will
00:22:50:# Want me to burn
00:22:54:# I will
00:23:01:#Yes, I will. #
00:23:17:NICK: If you can enter into the song|and enter into the heart of the song,
00:23:21:into the present moment,|forget everything else,
00:23:24:you can be kind of taken away...
00:23:27:and then you're sort of godlike|for a moment,
00:23:30:and sometimes it doesn't, by the way.
00:23:32:It's not that the moment you walk on, you|turn into an angel or something like that.
00:23:35:Sometimes it doesn't happen.
00:23:37:- An angel?|- OK. Let's... Yeah, yeah, whatever.
00:23:40:Is this a...a theme in your songs -|of responsibility and accountability?
00:23:47:Um...l have a kind of weird relationship|with the idea of God,
00:23:51:because within my songwriting world,|some kind of being like that exists.
00:23:56:- Someone watching?|- Yeah.
00:23:59:Someone taking score, let's say.
00:24:01:In the real world,|I don't believe in such a thing.
00:24:04:You know, when I had a...|a real interest in religion
00:24:08:was when I was taking a lot of drugs.
00:24:10:- Mm.|- You know, I was a junkie.
00:24:12:I would wake up and need to score
00:24:15:and the first thing I would do|is go to church...
00:24:18:Mm.
00:24:19:...and I would sit|through the entire service,
00:24:22:listening to the priest rant on up there|and shake his hand on the way out,
00:24:27:and then head up, er...|Portobello Road to Golborne Road.
00:24:31:The dealers were just coming out|you know, at that time,
00:24:33:and I could score|and then go back to my...
00:24:36:- Mm.|- ...flat, take the drugs and sort of go,
00:24:39:- "There," you know?|- Mm.
00:24:40:I'd do a little...little bit of good
00:24:41:and a little...|and, "What's the problem" type of thing,
00:24:44:and I really felt on some level
00:24:47:that I had a kind|of workable balance in my life.
00:24:50:- Mm. Mm.|- I mean, it was mad.
00:24:54:You know, I mean, when...when I met Susie,|Susie was like, you know,
00:24:59:"You're, er...you know, doing|something really dangerous here
00:25:03:"and...and...and life-threatening
00:25:07:"and, um...you know,|I want you to vow to me
00:25:10:"that you'll never go to church again"...
00:25:12:- (THEY CHUCKLE)|- ...kind of thing.
00:25:15:And when you're performing,|do you ever have that sense
00:25:18:of being an outsider or not?
00:25:20:No, I don't.
00:25:21:I find performing to be something|much more, um...kind of communal
00:25:25:and a much more sort of|gathering together of people and...
00:25:28:I mean you get...carried away, right?
00:25:33:- You get taken away, anyway.|- Mm.
00:25:35:Something happens on stage.
00:25:36:- Once you're on the stage?|- Yeah. Not even before
00:25:38:I get near the stage.|In fact, before I'm on the stage,
00:25:41:before, in the band room, it's horrendous,
00:25:44:because you can't really understand|how you can do the show.
00:25:47:But something happens on stage, um...
00:25:51:that takes you away from that|and it's those kind of concerts,
00:25:56:it's the concerts that we're trying to do|that are so important,
00:26:00:and they're so important|for, um...the audience.
00:26:03:To go beyond something?
00:26:05:Well, not every gig you're gonna go to|is gonna make you feel that way,
00:26:09:but when...when they do...
00:26:11:I mean, I put on a concert|at the London Meltdown with Nina Simone,
00:26:16:and before she went on,|she called me to her room,
00:26:20:and she was sitting there in this chair,|and she was like the nastiest woman.
00:26:25:She had this big, white, blousy thing on|and this kind of Cleopatra make-up,
00:26:29:and she said...
00:26:31:(MIMICS NINA) "I want you|to introduce me!" like that,
00:26:33:and I'm like "OK, how do you want me|to introduce you?"
00:26:35:(MIMICS NINA) "I am Dr Nina Simone!"|like this, and I'm like, "OK, OK.”
00:26:40:and, er...l went out and I introduced her,
00:26:43:and she walked up to the...|to the front of the stage.
00:26:45:She...she was not well and it took her|a long time to even get onto the stage
00:26:50:and she walked up|to the front of the stage
00:26:52:and held her sort of fists by the sides
00:26:54:and stared at the audience with this|expression of loathing on her face,
00:26:59:and everyone's just sitting in their seats|like, "What is...what's gonna happen?"
00:27:03:and she sat down at the piano
00:27:04:and she took the gum out of her mouth|and stuck it onto the piano
00:27:08:and just kind of launched into this show,
00:27:11:and through the process of this show,
00:27:14:um...became this other thing,
00:27:16:and you could see it within the audience,
00:27:18:- how they responded to this...|- Mm.
00:27:20:...until the end she was up the front and|touching people and dancing on the stage,
00:27:25:and it was an absolute|trans-formative performance
00:27:28:and it absolutely changed|everybody in a...
00:27:31:you know, that could|pay witness to that...
00:27:33:- Mm.|- ...show.
00:27:34:And to me, that's what we should...
00:27:37:that's what we should be trying to...|to do when...when you go on stage.
00:27:43:You know, I don't know|how it is for other people,
00:27:45:but I think on some level|we all want to be somebody else,
00:27:49:and we all look for that trans-formative|thing that can happen in...in our lives
00:27:55:and I think most people find it|in some way or another
00:27:58:and that's a place that they can forget|who they are and become somebody else.
00:28:03:- By forgetting who they are?|- Yeah.
00:28:06:By forgetting who they are.
00:28:08:Mm.
00:28:09:And I think maybe that's what I'm talking|about with my father reading Lolita.
00:28:13:- I noticed that about him...|- Mm.
00:28:15:...you know, that he was doing something.
00:28:17:He was only reading this, but he was|engaged in this on a different level
00:28:21:and, er...and was thrilled|to read this to...his child.
00:28:26:Mm.
00:28:27:How old were you when he died?
00:28:30:Er...l was
00:28:32:um...19.
00:28:35:- Hm.|- And, er...yeah.
00:28:39:Um...
00:28:41:and that...that really|just came out of the blue.
00:28:44:That was, um...something that kind of|rocked the whole family and...
00:28:52:Shall we stop there?
00:28:59:(SEAGULLS CRY OUTSIDE)
00:29:01:(SEAGULLS CRY
00:29:19:- NICK: You turn it on.|- (ENGINE STARTS)
00:29:22:You turn it off.
00:29:26:But then one day you find you can't,
00:29:27:and you've become the thing|you wished into existence...
00:29:31:...back when you were a kid|up in your room
00:29:33:and singing into a broom|with the door locked.
00:29:36:You've dreamed yourself to the outside,|and nothing can bring you back in,
00:29:41:and, anyway, you're not sure you ever|wanted to be in there in the first place.
00:29:50:You know...you know, I was just thinking,|you know what I mean.
00:29:53:Are you, er...
00:29:56:Do you worry about getting old|or anything like that?
00:29:59:I think, you know, when you get|to our age, you do worry about it.