why is everyone anger, conflict, those related to work, and overwork don Why Is Everyone So Angry According to the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety vio- lent aggressive driving which some dub "road rage been rising by 7 percent per year.31 sideline rage at ama has teur and professional sporting events has become so wide spread that a Pennsylvania midget football game ended in a brawl involving more than 100 coaches, players, parents and fans No one seems immune. Women fly off the handle just as often as men, although they're less likely to get physical The young and the infamous, including several rappers and musicians sentenced to anger management classes for vio- h lent outbursts, may seem more volatile, but ordinary senior citizens have erupted into "line rage" and pushed ahead of others simply because they feel they've "waited long enough" in their lives "Everyone everywhere seems to be hotter under the collar these days," observes Sybil Evans, a conflict resolu tion expert who singles out three primary culprits: time technology, and tension."Americans are working longer hours than anyone else in the world. The cell phones and pagers that were supposed to make our lives easier have put us on call 24-7-365. Since we're always running, we're tense and low on patience, and the less patience we have the less we monitor what we say to people and how we "32 treat them. rate boardroom is resolving conflicts. he key is to focus n the problem, not the individual. Try to put aside unconscious biases, such as assuming a person is difficult to deal with, or preconceived notions about what others really want. Rather than planning what you might say, tocus your attention on what others are saying. Professionals recommend the following steps: Listen. To work through a conflict, you need to understand the other person's point of view. This demands careful listening in a quiet, private setting, away from activity and background noise. If conflict erupts in a public place, move the discussion elsewhere. Assimilate. Rather than taking a position and focus- ing only on defending it, try not to shut yourself off to other possibilities. Keep open the possibility that no one party is completely right or completely wrong. To get a fresh perspective, consider the situation from the person." If you were seeing the conflict from the outside, what would you think about the informa tion? Once you've taken in all available information, ask yourself: What do I know now about the overall situation? Has my opinion changed? Respond. Especially if another person is responding in anger, give a calm, well-reasoned response. It will help defuse a highly emotional situation. Try to find a common goal that will benefit you both. Restate the other person's position when both of you are finished speaking so you both know you've been heard and understood.