I can only assume that you mean it is very hard for you to stay in this relationship. I can not answer that question for you Tuk or change anything about me. I do not have a girlfriend here. There is no other lady. But if it is to hard for you to stay in this relationship all I can suggest is that you end the relationship before you get hurt any more. I understand the challenges in our relationship and it is difficult. But I also want you to be happy. If you feel this relationship will bring you pain in the future I suggest you end it. But only you can make that decision. What ever decision you make I will always love you.