The boys’ room was still dark. The weight of Chris’ sleeping body was almost too heavy to lift, and I sank to the floor with him in my lap. He smelled like baby shampoo and boy sweat and slept, unaware. Across the room the nightlight illuminated Keith’s deep red hair. I watched his face until he woke up. Sliding off his bed, he sat on the floor beside us. With my free arm I pulled him to my side.
“What’s the matter, Mommy?” he had Brian’s eyes – those dark, feathery lashes.Part II: The Hijacker
Julie Busic moved into my head gradually like an unwanted voice, a notion that took root and wouldn’t leave. I read the police reports and newsprint about the hijacking over and over, made notes, drew up a parallel of our lives and projected into her life.
We were born the same year, married around the same time, both earned master’s degrees and had become educators. She was a teacher of English as a second language at a private school. I was a professor of English at a community college.
I could see her, the glaring face from the newspaper, and longed to re-create the picture, change the truth and curve the details so that it was she who lost the man she loved, she who mourned.
I wanted her to suffer, to hate her, yet something about her intrigued me. Why did she do it? Reports said she was a reluctant participant, went along with the hijacking of a passenger jet to support her husband, his sacrifice for Croatia, a country she had come to love. Their demand was to print a proclamation in major newspapers that detailed the atrocities perpetrated upon the Croatians by the Yugoslavs. A live bomb was placed in the subway locker so police would believe they had additional explosives aboard the hijacked plane. Upon surrender, police found the dynamite strapped to Busic’s chest was filled with silly-putty.
“We never meant for this to happen,” the newspapers quoted her. “We never thought the bomb would explode, and I will forever regret the harm we caused. I carry the ultimate guilt, and must come to terms with it in the dark days ahead.”
“Daddy went to heaven.” I didn’t recognize my voice.
“How did he get there?”
“God came to get him.”
“Can we go see him?”
“Not for a long time, honey.” I didn’t trust myself to say more.
The sun was beginning to rise, a yellow-red glow slid over blue sailboat wallpaper. It was going to be another hot day. The milk bottles had to go out. Library books were due. My husband died, I would tell the librarian, and thought she might forgive the fine.
Chris woke and blinked sleepily at me. He had my deep green eyes set in a face that called for blue, the difference striking. His hair was almost white from the summer sun. He put his arms around my neck and buried his face in my shoulder, as though he knew something was trying to pull me away from him.
Keith leaned against me. “Can we have our breakfast now, Mommy?”
The smell of coffee drifted up the stairs as though Brian were in the kitchen, as though it were a normal morning.
A policewoman I hadn’t noticed before was standing in the doorway, and when I rose, she placed a robe over my short nightgown. Chris, big for a 2-year-old, slipped from my arms, and she took him from me. Together we made our way down those dizzying stairs to a house full of NYPD.
Cigarette smoke hung in the air. Ray was sitting in the kitchen, and he stood when he saw me, a cup of black coffee on the table in front of him. Brian’s cup.
I looked at Ray. “Croatians?”Part III: Our Letters
The boys’ room was still dark. The weight of Chris’ sleeping body was almost too heavy to lift, and I sank to the floor with him in my lap. He smelled like baby shampoo and boy sweat and slept, unaware. Across the room the nightlight illuminated Keith’s deep red hair. I watched his face until he woke up. Sliding off his bed, he sat on the floor beside us. With my free arm I pulled him to my side.
“What’s the matter, Mommy?” he had Brian’s eyes – those dark, feathery lashes.Part II: The Hijacker
Julie Busic moved into my head gradually like an unwanted voice, a notion that took root and wouldn’t leave. I read the police reports and newsprint about the hijacking over and over, made notes, drew up a parallel of our lives and projected into her life.
We were born the same year, married around the same time, both earned master’s degrees and had become educators. She was a teacher of English as a second language at a private school. I was a professor of English at a community college.
I could see her, the glaring face from the newspaper, and longed to re-create the picture, change the truth and curve the details so that it was she who lost the man she loved, she who mourned.
I wanted her to suffer, to hate her, yet something about her intrigued me. Why did she do it? Reports said she was a reluctant participant, went along with the hijacking of a passenger jet to support her husband, his sacrifice for Croatia, a country she had come to love. Their demand was to print a proclamation in major newspapers that detailed the atrocities perpetrated upon the Croatians by the Yugoslavs. A live bomb was placed in the subway locker so police would believe they had additional explosives aboard the hijacked plane. Upon surrender, police found the dynamite strapped to Busic’s chest was filled with silly-putty.
“We never meant for this to happen,” the newspapers quoted her. “We never thought the bomb would explode, and I will forever regret the harm we caused. I carry the ultimate guilt, and must come to terms with it in the dark days ahead.”
“Daddy went to heaven.” I didn’t recognize my voice.
“How did he get there?”
“God came to get him.”
“Can we go see him?”
“Not for a long time, honey.” I didn’t trust myself to say more.
The sun was beginning to rise, a yellow-red glow slid over blue sailboat wallpaper. It was going to be another hot day. The milk bottles had to go out. Library books were due. My husband died, I would tell the librarian, and thought she might forgive the fine.
Chris woke and blinked sleepily at me. He had my deep green eyes set in a face that called for blue, the difference striking. His hair was almost white from the summer sun. He put his arms around my neck and buried his face in my shoulder, as though he knew something was trying to pull me away from him.
Keith leaned against me. “Can we have our breakfast now, Mommy?”
The smell of coffee drifted up the stairs as though Brian were in the kitchen, as though it were a normal morning.
A policewoman I hadn’t noticed before was standing in the doorway, and when I rose, she placed a robe over my short nightgown. Chris, big for a 2-year-old, slipped from my arms, and she took him from me. Together we made our way down those dizzying stairs to a house full of NYPD.
Cigarette smoke hung in the air. Ray was sitting in the kitchen, and he stood when he saw me, a cup of black coffee on the table in front of him. Brian’s cup.
I looked at Ray. “Croatians?”Part III: Our Letters
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