You have no idea Sara. I meant everything I said.
When I got home from Thailand it was a Monday, I was going to tell Gill I was leaving on the Wednesday. Tuesday morning she told me she had to go to the doctor for a blood test. They were testing her for luekimia. I thought then that if I was a good person I had to be there for her. Then Friday night she saw a photo of you and I. It was then that I explained to Gill what I was going to tell her the Wednesday before.
It turned out after the test she was clear but still needs to be checked in the future. In fact she is getting the next test this Monday.
With that in mind and my family not wanting to speak to me I felt I needed my family.
I know it doesn't help you and how you feel about the way it ended and for that I am so sorry.
Even today I am in pain with matt's attitude towards me.
I'm suffering, I deserve to suffer because of what I have done.
Sara, I'm sorry I hurt you. From my heart I am sorry.