Harm to Family
For the husband or wife, the rejection inherent in divorce is intensely personal, not really comparable to any other disappointment that life may give. Individuals who have separated or divorced soon find that many of their social activities and expectations must change. Friends that the husband and wife had in common often must choose with which of the two they will associate. Social routines vanish. Activities once done by the couple and their friends must now be done singly or not at all. No doubt sides may be chosen and all sorts of “knowledgeable” advice given, especially if the advisor has been divorced herself or himself. Old friends are lost, new acquaintance may be gained, and the divorced or separated person’s general social pattern changes, sometimes drastically.
There are few winners in a divorce, yet it often appears that some people find themselves losing more than could be considered fair by any standards. Fathers, more often than not, lose much of the intimacy and companionship of their children. Mothers often must drastically change their lifestyle to meet the needs of the new, partial family. Both of the ex-spouses usually discover that the income(s) that formerly barely supported one roof cannot be stretched to support two. Then the welfare empire may take control of the family. Winning and losing in divorce are hardly applicable terms at all.
Concerning the relatives, it is probably natural to assume that they will divide up along family lines, with one set of grandparents often losing a relationship with their grandchildren. Occasionally a divorce may pit family members against one another. Everyone, friends and relatives of the divorcing couple are affected to some degree or another. Often parents of divorcing individuals become involved, overly involved, to the detriment of everyone concerned.
If a couple has been married for a short time and have no children, a divorce will probably have little, if any, impact, other than sending one or two more disillusioned people into the world. It is perhaps comparable to a high school or college romance, especially if the principals are young. Granted, there are many more technicalities involved in beginning and ending the “legal” romance, but unless it ends in financial ruin for the husband or wife, the repercussions are probably similar to a broken romance. When children are involved, the issues are qualitatively different than if a childless couple divorces.
Because of the children’s and the non-custodian’s visiting rights, the parents will still have to deal with each other whether they part friends or enemies. If ill feelings remain, no doubt they will color the children’s attitudes toward their parents. The non-custodian may eventually find himself losing the affections of his children unless a strong, positive relationship is maintained.
When a couple has children, their implicit commitment is not only to the marriage, but also to the family. The couple is not only husband and wife, but mother and father. Children have a right to a home. Parents have the primary responsibility to provide that home. When children are born to a couple, their “life style” options are greatly reduced. That couple has developed into a family in the true sense of the word, and their primary responsibilities must be with the family. If parents shirk these responsibilities to “fulfill themselves,” they are, and should feel, very guilty, “mod-psychology” to the contrary notwithstanding.
Harm to FamilyFor the husband or wife, the rejection inherent in divorce is intensely personal, not really comparable to any other disappointment that life may give. Individuals who have separated or divorced soon find that many of their social activities and expectations must change. Friends that the husband and wife had in common often must choose with which of the two they will associate. Social routines vanish. Activities once done by the couple and their friends must now be done singly or not at all. No doubt sides may be chosen and all sorts of “knowledgeable” advice given, especially if the advisor has been divorced herself or himself. Old friends are lost, new acquaintance may be gained, and the divorced or separated person’s general social pattern changes, sometimes drastically.There are few winners in a divorce, yet it often appears that some people find themselves losing more than could be considered fair by any standards. Fathers, more often than not, lose much of the intimacy and companionship of their children. Mothers often must drastically change their lifestyle to meet the needs of the new, partial family. Both of the ex-spouses usually discover that the income(s) that formerly barely supported one roof cannot be stretched to support two. Then the welfare empire may take control of the family. Winning and losing in divorce are hardly applicable terms at all.Concerning the relatives, it is probably natural to assume that they will divide up along family lines, with one set of grandparents often losing a relationship with their grandchildren. Occasionally a divorce may pit family members against one another. Everyone, friends and relatives of the divorcing couple are affected to some degree or another. Often parents of divorcing individuals become involved, overly involved, to the detriment of everyone concerned.If a couple has been married for a short time and have no children, a divorce will probably have little, if any, impact, other than sending one or two more disillusioned people into the world. It is perhaps comparable to a high school or college romance, especially if the principals are young. Granted, there are many more technicalities involved in beginning and ending the “legal” romance, but unless it ends in financial ruin for the husband or wife, the repercussions are probably similar to a broken romance. When children are involved, the issues are qualitatively different than if a childless couple divorces.Because of the children’s and the non-custodian’s visiting rights, the parents will still have to deal with each other whether they part friends or enemies. If ill feelings remain, no doubt they will color the children’s attitudes toward their parents. The non-custodian may eventually find himself losing the affections of his children unless a strong, positive relationship is maintained.When a couple has children, their implicit commitment is not only to the marriage, but also to the family. The couple is not only husband and wife, but mother and father. Children have a right to a home. Parents have the primary responsibility to provide that home. When children are born to a couple, their “life style” options are greatly reduced. That couple has developed into a family in the true sense of the word, and their primary responsibilities must be with the family. If parents shirk these responsibilities to “fulfill themselves,” they are, and should feel, very guilty, “mod-psychology” to the contrary notwithstanding.
การแปล กรุณารอสักครู่..