But private memory acts in a different way. It is market by fragility and its delicate membranes are lost when the person either forgets it, or get it all mixed up with other things that happened in his life. The voices suppressed in the official memory, in a culture that is democratic are presumably heard and set aside. But there is no place in pubic memory for any personal feelings. It’s the nature of such memory that they exclude the inconvenient, the embarrassing, and the highly personal. While public memory is of bravery, private memory is of grief. Bravery is a virtue but grief is an emotion.