When ur life is in darkness......
Pray 2 God and ask Him 2 free u from darkness..... and
If u r still in darkness..Pls pay ur electric bill.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
You can be sure of one thing;
Either the car is new or the wife is new.
An angry china man entered a shop and shouted :
Where's my free gift with this cooking oil?
Shopkeeper : What free gift??
China man : Oi, here got put "Cholesterol FREE!"
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,... Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant.
Panic is when both are pregnant.
Grammar Teacher: Do you know the importance of a period?
Kid: Yeah, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom fainted, dad got a heart attack
& our driver ran away...
A young boy asks his Dad: "What is the difference between confident and confidential?
Dad says: "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that is confidential.
Comedy of errors :
A man checked into a hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send a mail to his wife. he accidentally typed d wrong email address, and without realizing he sent the mail to a widow who has just returned from her husband's funeral. The widow decided to check her mail, expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends. After reading d first message she fainted. The son rushed into d room, found his mother on the floor and saw d computer screen which read:
'to my loving wife, i knw you are surprised to hear from me, they hv computers here and we are allowed to send mails to loved ones. I 've just been checked in. How are you and d kids, d place is realy nice but am lonely here. I hv made necessary arrangement 4 ur arrival 2morrow. Expecting you darling. I can't wait to see you.