Emotions: State the feelings you sense so that the person really feels heard. Describe these feelings using nonjudgmental words so that no one feels put down. When we are aware of our own emotions, they become more manageable. and it becomes easier for us to listen and think. For example instead of "Are you hurt because you feel she doesn't value you ? " or “You’re really furious because she treats you like a machine!” try “Are you angry because you want her to acknowledge the positive things you have done?