The Authentic Sexual Self is the genuine essence of your sexuality. It lies deep within your being and is a unique expression of your desires, your true innermost fantasies that no one else knows or sees. Some spend a lifetime ignoring it, while others search for it in vain. The Authentic Sexual Self is that powerful place within each of us where the fire is always burning; yet many freeze to death because they cannot access its heat.
As a sex-positive therapist and intimacy advisor I find many clients come to me feeling sexually hollow, suffering from an emptiness of passion. They are either completely detached or unaware of their own desires and fantasies. In fact many of them create a false sexual self in response to what society and others have told them about sexuality: that you must look a certain way, be a certain age, or behave a particular way to be a healthy sexual being. Sadly some individuals simply stay disconnected, or stop themselves from expressing their authentic sexuality, because of a fear of what family members, social and religious authorities, or even their partners may think.