Pim,
1st I still love you. I hope you understand this e-mail and why I have sent it. Please do not get angry with me as it is sent with affection - not hate - so we can move forwards together hand in hand.
Now, some things like money are very hard to talk about and put down into words between us, but if I do not try then we will not understand each other.
First a bit of history.
I married Supreeya, bought ring, necklace, bracelet, I paid for everything including dowry. As far as I was concerned it did not matter, she would be my wife. I spent a LOT of money. When I left Thailand she took the gold ring, necklace and bracelet and sold them for imitation jewelry. What you saw in that photo was sold within 24 hours of me leaving Thailand.
I married Meaw. I did the same for her as Supreeya - I doubted what Supreeya had done would happen again with Meaw. But it did. Once again I was made to feel a fool for spending out all this money that was just in the end used to support their families after they left me.
I have paid so much money out for these things that I am now a VERY VERY cautious person.
I did not have the boys then and I do now, so their financial welfare is one of my priorities now also. I am not prepared to do the same again.
I am not saying that I do not want to marry you - I do, but you need to understand things as they are currently.
If this means that you do not want to marry me, then I will know that your priorities and love were not the same as mine.
You keep telling me I have to give you gifts, I understand a wedding ring - but others ? I do not know what they are, but I am not prepared to spend vast amounts of money now and not be living with you like I did with others in the past. I will not be caught out again. I have to protect myself and children. So I ask many things you want come to you in our future together.
It is nothing against you or your family. Your family have to understand you are a 37 year old woman with 2 children and who does not want to bear me children. I have told you I am OK with this - i love you, your children and more children is not an option for you. Marrying you is going to be a big investment over all three of your lives - especially if I legally adopt your daughters. And your parents have to understand my situation too with my children.
I have told you I would sign with you to make you my wife so you know I would return and put a ring on your finger so you could see every day my love for you.
My plan was to come back for two months early next year, and then start living together fully shortly after on fiance visa. That is my plan.
I have to sort my house out - rent it out, or sell it. It is a big commitment.
So Yes, I will sign with you and buy a ring to show you are my wife, but anything else depends what it is and how badly you want me to be living with you, how much it costs and what you want. The more I spend out now the longer I will be living away form you.
I ask you to think what you want from me Pim - my money is tied up in my house currently. I come to Thailand with about 150,000 baht available to me.
Marrying you means an investment in yours, your children and your parents future, to build your dream faster for you and them.
I am happy to give you parents money each month we live together, they would be family, and I would always help them out, aswell as your (our) children. I am happy to build your dream.
Believe me Pim, I so much want to marry you and live with you, but not under circumstances that I have previously been through. I have to be certain that my dream is achieved too.
I hope you an understand what I mean PIm in this e-mail. I am not accusing you of being the same as Meaw and Supreeya - I'm not. But you need to understand my fears too.
I want to marry you, and I hope you understand.
Please do not start sending e-mails back to me saying that I think you want me only for money - I do not. that is not what I am saying here. I am trying to build our future - not destroy it.
I will know if you love me by your response to this e-mail.
hopefully still your husband
Richard