I read your story. Thank you so much for writing. It must be difficult to be in your situation. Maybe I can help you. I have studied to become a psychologist at University. I have a degree. I can show you. Yes I have read a lot about depression and how it affect people. I want you to get better. To feel healthy in your soul and body. I don't want you to suffer from pain inside. You can always talk to me if you want. I will tell nobody about your depression