Don’t marry him." He says, not caring about sounding like pleading a bit (all forgetting about how much she hates people who plead to get what they want). She merely looks at him, and it’s the first time he has realized that even her fire-like eyes can’t warm up the winter that are bitting both of their exposed heart.
Yanks her arm of his grasp. “I must.” Scathingly. Eyes contact with, god, thosebeautifulandbright red eyes. They betray no emotion, but he knows there is a tiniest spark somewhere deep down. Tells her you will give up anything for her. And he would if she could just let him.
Lets her fingers slip through his. Tracks in the snow. She walks away.
She sheds tear.
He’s alone.
They’re a countdown - three, two, one - and time is up and everything is done. But he’s still seeping deeper and deeper and doesn’t know where to stop.
Her eyes, red and wonderful and all, burning into his memory, and god, she’s getting to be too much. They’re getting to be too much. Because now he hears her voice in empty rooms, catches glimpses of her in overcrowded street. Seeing her face in every shape, every raindrop, and every glass reflection.
There is once time that he’s afraid of going out because he can’t handle the disappointment in seeing another girl with red hair without the blazing eyes, the sway of the hips that Akashi has but without the elegance, and, well, the thing is, she taste so much like the salt in his tear.
He loses his breath when he sees her next. Running the finger over that red dress. Hair down like a goddess. Eyes like perfection.
"You look great, like always." She hears. She turns. She looks. Lung dying. Heart stops.
"It’s nice of you to say so."
He brushes her hair, his fingers over her checks. She doesn’t look away. “I love you”. he whispers, “I love you.”
"He loves me, too." Confession. Want. Need. Pain.
"No one can love me as I do."
Silence. Eyes locking.
Countdown again - three, two, one - and time is up.
(and she presses her lips against his).
And everything explodes, fire everywhere, flames surrounding. Burning world. Everything is scattering and falling.
He loves her.
Life is like repeated song.
It plays and plays and it’s good at first, and then it becomes annoying, and it turns into a ghost then a demon, haunting his ear, over and over again, until it’s all too much and he thinks he’s gone mental and if the sound of her voice doesn’t stop echoing in his mind, he’s going to be insane than he’s already been -
flash of her - in his imagination - red hair and red eyes and nice laughter and wrist and nails - he misses them too much that he thinks he could die if it meant to see them all over again.
"If you hurt her," Daiki had said "You’ll get yourself killed."
"Do you really think I can do that?"
"But if she hurts you, don’t say I don’t warn you."
Despite that, Satsuki has never regretted that he didn’t listen.
Ryouta comes up to him, says: “Momoichii, you can do this forever. You have to be at her wedding. She would like you to.”
"No." He doesn’t mean to go harsh on Ryouta, but why does everyone else think that he needs comfort? He’s completely fine with being alone.
"You can’t torture yourself," the blonde continues. "Akashichii also wants you to be happy."
If she wanted that, she shouldn’t get married to someone else.
"Yes, happy, indeed. I’ll be a good friend and come to her wedding, but I’m not going to be happy."
"Momoichii, she’s doing this for you. Her father could have done something terrible."
I know.
He wants to say, but he’s too much of a coward to protect her.
"Satsuki, I think you’re better than that." And she finally comes. Hair floating. Stroking his forehead. "Don’t make me hate you."
"I’ve already hated me." He catches she smiling. "I love you."
She remains silent.
"I know." Finally. "I know."
"Do you still love me?"
"Stop that." She demands.
“‘I hate me’ or ‘I love you’?”
"Both."
He smiles and defies the empress.
"I love you."
She leans down and kisses him. Gently. Lightly. Pull away. He wants to tug her back. Hold her close. Never let go.
"We can’t do this."
And she leaves as quick as she arrives.
Wedding music begins inside.
He’s stuck in the car. Listening to the music. Some male singers wailing about lost love. Yeah, you’ve got it bad.
By now, she’s walking to the alter in this perfect dress - while doesn’t suit her, he thinks to himself, Satsuki has even prepared a wedding with red wedding dress - off to a new life with her fiance.
He loves her so bad.
Stands at the door away. Watches. Waits. Like always.
She turns around and meets his gaze. And a single drop of tear falls down.
He smiles and dies a little inside.
"I do."
Everything is blurry now.
The remaining sound is her (brokenbutfirm) voice.
He catches her in his arms on the dance floor. Twirls her around like it meant to be - like when they were in Teikou and young and invincible.
"So, I guess it all ends here." He says. He wants to laugh.
"Don’t do this now." She sighs. And he remembers her kisses on his necks.
Ah, he has to learn how to forget now.
"I’m sorry." He murmurs, scattering kisses on her head, lost in her hair. "I’ll always love you."
"Don’t. Be happy."
He really laughs this time.
Lets his fingers slips through her. Track on her heart. He’s walking away. She’s lost in the sea of people.
She’s faking a smile.
And he’s still alone.
There’s countdown - three, two, one - time is up and everything is done.