Lessons from My Mother-in-Law
There are many lessons I continue to learn from my mother-in-law. One is learning to let go. When her youngest left the nest, Mommy was also left alone in a big house, left to pick up the pieces of her life. After many years of caring and nurturing, she has learned to let go of each of her children, confident in the way she brought them up. With tears in her eyes, she has learned to let go of them and let them live their own lives. She has also learned to let go of the big and small treasures that were left behind - her clothes, the toys, the china, the furniture, appliances, the house – and the many memories that surround them. Some of tehse treasures she has given to someone who could use them, some to her children, most to her beloved church; in essence, letting a part of her heart go with them.
Paradoxically, I also learn from her lesson on holding on – that is, holding on to those that seem unimportant or irrelevant, but are really of great value. Like the things her own mother used to have, like the crocheted fabrics that her mother so beautifully made, or the china cabinet that stood there for generations, the kitchen gadgets that she and her sister used. Now, she thinks her own granddaughter could use them.
She has held on to pieces that have a story to tell, things that she uses to bridge generations. Faded pictures, diaries, love letters from her children, moments of childhood – these she has kept in her heart and in her drawer, ready to tell a story or two about the good days. She holds on to the values she grew up with. She holds on to old-fashioned things character and integrity.