You misunderstand me, just feel the difference the waiting in the time don't same. After receiving an email with a message that the , You tell me need to decide about my feelings. The first I read I feel you don't believe in me , yes I may feel suffering because away far from you but I have hope , I hope someday we are together and the hope make I can live. If I live without you I don't happy. It means I can't live without you.