How to start a conversation
Small talk can be all or nothing in international business. Sometime cultural differences are an interesting topic of conversation. Sometimes, they’ re a barrier. These’ s a growing market for ‘cross-cultural’ training, where businesspeople are taught what to do and say (and what not to do and say) when they meet people from different parts of the world. There’ s a lot to learn.
Good communication skills project an image of confidence and intelligence. Although these are natural to some extent, they can be acquired by practice and preparation. Sometimes it is useful to develop a strategy for when you want to start a conversation with someone you don’t know.
Start with “Hello” and then simply tell the other person your name and ask them theirs. Then offer your hand to shake.
Look around and see if there is anything unusual to point out. (Talking about the weather is probably not a good idea unless there is something very unusual about it – a storm, snow, tornado, etc.) “Have you seen that picture over there?” “This is an interesting building – I wonder how old it is?”
If you can offer a compliment about something, but only if it is sincere and not too personal. For example, “That’ s a great tie, where did you get it ?” Or “I saw you using an iPhone earlier – looks very nice. Are you happy with it?”
Ask questions which will make the other person feel that they are interesting. People like talking about themselves but don’ t make the question too personal. Ask for their opinion about things and their possible experience of current issues and situations.“ What did you think of the presentation?” have you been affected by this postal strike?” It’ s not a bad idea to mentally prepare a list of possible topics before you begin the conversation.
Avoid politics and religion because they are sensitive subjects for some people.
Instead of worrying about what you are going to say next, listen carefully to what the other person is saying and take up any conversation opportunities he offers you. Agree, disagree, ask follow – up question and offer opinions to show that you are interested.
Look the other person in the eye, but don’ t stare or get too close. Occasionally smile, but avoid using a fixed grin like a lunatic,
All the strategies above are really just tricks to get going. Once you have broken the ice, hopefully the ongoing conversation will be relaxed and enjoyable. If things don’ t go well and the rapport really is’ t there, it’ s better to give up and back off gracefully.