“Oh, it’s very sad, really sad. Today, I lost the pleasure of being a mother. I don’t fight for this anymore. No way. I’m afraid. I had the desire of being a mother. It was a dream. But today I don’t have this dream anymore, because I suffered the loss. I already loved my baby. It was a girl and I loved her so much. Look, you’ve already heard of those people who have difficulty having children, who have sickle cell anemia. Just because they know they can’t have a baby, they want to have it. I was sad because I didn’t have success in my pregnancy. I couldn’t even see the face of my child. And the doctor didn’t show me. The doctors came only to tell me that my child had died, but they did not show me the child. No. Oh, it’s really sad, it’s horrible. I even won a doll (laughs). Then when I saw a little baby in the hands of other people, I would start willing to have that child. I didn’t care, I wanted it, that’s what I wanted. My companion also wanted this child very much. I went to the juvenile court to adopt one. If I saw someone with a bunch of kids I wanted to grab it. I almost went crazy, because after that my husband ended up with another woman and she became pregnant. I was mad with depression. Only then I let go other people’s children. I play with the children of my neighbors. For me, my child had to survive, I only thought about that. I had great faith in God that my child would survive.” (CSD 4)