In general, self theories tell us that the development of the sense of self is a matter
of first learning to distinguish oneself from others by means of visual, auditory, and
still other perceptual modes. Later on in this process, the child is taught--informally
as well as formally--to apply appropriate verbal statements in making these distinctions. In this way the child comes to know or identify himself by virtue of the fact that these other 'labels' have reference to objects or people that are not him. The
child has his own 'label'. What makes these other objects or persons significant is
not simply that they are distinguishable from the self, but more importantly, that
each one of them has a given relationship to that self, that is, the child. The statement, 'That is a mommy,' distinguishes the child from 'a mommy'. When the child refers to a person as 'my mommy', then not only is the other person identified, but in turn the child is identified by means of his relationship to this other person. Much more,however, is involved in the development of self-identity beyond simply learning to recognize these perceptual and verbal distinctions between other people and oneself.