Hi Sara,
We have separated because I have drifted apart. After 30 years I don't wish to be with her anymore like I did in previous years.
There is businesses and finances that have stopped me from making a 100% break away.
This is why I've been saying to you to wait until next year. So I can make the adjustments to everything business and financial wise so that there isn't any ties.
I think the problem has evolved from working and living together for so long. People change, she has changed, I have changed and sometimes when changes happen we look for better horizons with someone else.
I went through this four years ago, I wasn't looking for anyone else at the time but a Thai lady and I crossed paths in Vanuatu. We started a relationship there and was living a double life before I knew it. It wasn't planned, it just happened. After about six months my wife found out and the Thai lady left. Her name was Got. She was a very nice person who I liked quite a lot. She left Vanuatu, and so I'm told married a man in Sydney.
Since then my wife and I decided to try and make things better for ourselves, it worked out ok for a few years but it has slowly slid back to the boring old ways.
I'm a person that likes to be positive in life, I never look at anything much negatively. My wife often can't see good or positive things in anything that happens. I think for her it's easier to look down on things.
You say you don't want to ruin a marriage. You're not. It was ruined by me four years ago when I did what I did.
I'm not proud of myself for what I did four years ago but I see it as circumstances at the time leading me to it.
This time I have understood myself clearer and know what I want.
When I went on oasis I wasn't really looking for anyone as such for romance. I was looking for someone to hang out with and stay in touch for future visits twice a year. Then there was our first meeting. I really liked you, your looks, your personality and your love of life.
Now I wish I was a lot more clear from the start with you Sara. We either would of stopped it then or talked about what future there is.
It's up to you now to say to me if you want to wait for me to sort out my commitments here or do you want to walk away from me and wish we had never met?
If you decide to walk, I can't blame you at all. If you decide to wait, you will need to be patient, this will take some time.
I'm sorry it has come to this, you are a lovely person with so much to give.
I'm not going to ask you to wait and I'm not going to ask you to walk away. I need you to make that decision.
Finally, I apologise for taking all weekend to write this. My older son moved house on the weekend and I helped both days.
Gary
Hi Sara,
We have separated because I have drifted apart. After 30 years I don't wish to be with her anymore like I did in previous years.
There is businesses and finances that have stopped me from making a 100% break away.
This is why I've been saying to you to wait until next year. So I can make the adjustments to everything business and financial wise so that there isn't any ties.
I think the problem has evolved from working and living together for so long. People change, she has changed, I have changed and sometimes when changes happen we look for better horizons with someone else.
I went through this four years ago, I wasn't looking for anyone else at the time but a Thai lady and I crossed paths in Vanuatu. We started a relationship there and was living a double life before I knew it. It wasn't planned, it just happened. After about six months my wife found out and the Thai lady left. Her name was Got. She was a very nice person who I liked quite a lot. She left Vanuatu, and so I'm told married a man in Sydney.
Since then my wife and I decided to try and make things better for ourselves, it worked out ok for a few years but it has slowly slid back to the boring old ways.
I'm a person that likes to be positive in life, I never look at anything much negatively. My wife often can't see good or positive things in anything that happens. I think for her it's easier to look down on things.
You say you don't want to ruin a marriage. You're not. It was ruined by me four years ago when I did what I did.
I'm not proud of myself for what I did four years ago but I see it as circumstances at the time leading me to it.
This time I have understood myself clearer and know what I want.
When I went on oasis I wasn't really looking for anyone as such for romance. I was looking for someone to hang out with and stay in touch for future visits twice a year. Then there was our first meeting. I really liked you, your looks, your personality and your love of life.
Now I wish I was a lot more clear from the start with you Sara. We either would of stopped it then or talked about what future there is.
It's up to you now to say to me if you want to wait for me to sort out my commitments here or do you want to walk away from me and wish we had never met?
If you decide to walk, I can't blame you at all. If you decide to wait, you will need to be patient, this will take some time.
I'm sorry it has come to this, you are a lovely person with so much to give.
I'm not going to ask you to wait and I'm not going to ask you to walk away. I need you to make that decision.
Finally, I apologise for taking all weekend to write this. My older son moved house on the weekend and I helped both days.
Gary
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