Great idea.
Here is the latest edition
of the baby book I used.
Let Them Cry: The British Guide
to Raising Children.
The pages are all blank.
You don't read it.
It's for spanking.
You see
what I'm dealing with?
Oh, calm down, รีจอยร่า
It's a joke.
Laughter's the best
medicine, isn't it, Doctor?
As a board-certified
cardiologist...
That's not really
my specialty.
Now, here is baby Wilbur's
real gift.
That's funny.
Good one.
Don't be cheeky.
Scroggs have been christened
in this gown for generations.
Yeah, but as I mentioned
on the phone,
he's wearing a simple
cotton onesie.
Nonsense.
No God-fearing priest
would baptize a child
in a onesie.
He's not being baptized
by a priest.
Owen is protestant.
What? He's being baptized
by a heretic?
รีจอยร่า, if this is your idea
of a warm welcome, you have failed hideously.
Could be worse.
When I first came here
last year, they shot me.
What?
Owen, No.
Oh! Accidentally, of course.
Nothing serious.
Although sometimes I still get
a little numbness.
You told me that you met
Owen and Wilbur two weeks ago,
and now I find out
that you shot him last year?
And you've been keeping
my grandchildren from me
for some whatever--
ridiculous--
Oh... oh...
Oh, God, what is it now?
Oh, it's...
It's just a chest pain.
From the impact
of this lie, no doubt.
It's nothing, it's nothing.
I'm sure it's...
Right, Doctor?
As a board certified
cardiologist, that's--
Oh, God, I think this actually
is my specialty.
I could have died!
The only thing
you could have died from
is overacting! You've had
more fake heart attacks
than Fred Sanford!
And you--how could you forget
number on the list--
we met two weeks ago.
Number !
Shouldn't that have been
a little higher on the list,
like, I don't know,
maybe number one?
It was buried under
an avalanche of other lies
like amateur pastry chef
and Manchester United fan.
You don't root for Man U?
Shoot him again!
This is fun.
I'm glad I stayed.
I don't know why we are
focusing on these harmless lies
when one of us has been
literally disfigured!
Who was disfigured?
Me!
I gained three pounds
on those candies.
Five.
I turned your scale back.
Damn her.
Damn her to hell.
He can't.
He's protestant.
It's all carrot and no stick
with these people.
วิคตอเรีย ฉันต้องขอโทษด้วย
ฉันอยากขอให้เธอหยุดพูดเกี่ยวกับเอ็มเมทท์
I guess I got carried away.
I did unspeakable things
for you.
Thank you for going
to the post office.
You're welcome.
It's my dress
for the christening.
It's the one the good wife wore
to visit big in prison.
No, no. No, that's
the same dress that I ordered
to wear to the christening.
Oh, dear,
what a dilemma.
Whatever shall we do?
Why don't you wear the dress
this time,
because I'm gonna be so thin,
I won't be able to fit into mine after all that diet candy.
Oh, thank you.
You're the best!
You're a good girl.
Yes, you are.
Maybe you could
steam it for me too?
Don't you think you're abusing
Victoria just a little?
Don't you see