Canadian Wedding Traditions
Canada’s a fantastically scenic country with a wealth of areas which offer some very mixed, as well as individual, cultures and communities. That stunning cold north, for example, is an exciting blend of English and French origins and customs, whilst the Portuguese-Canadian families have their own influences. As such, many areas of Canada have their own distinct traditions and customs, which means that Canadian weddings can be as wonderfully varied, surprising and of course romantic as the country itself!
Canadian Engagements
Canadian marriages are love matches although the nature of the proposal will be individual to each couple’s lives, heritage and influences. In most communities, family bonds are strong and the majority of couples will certainly want to involve their families in a celebration to mark the occasion, usually with a family gathering or special meal.
A gathering with friends too often takes the form of a special event, although the primary focus of this is not necessarily to celebrate the engagement, but to act as a fundraiser for the wedding itself! In some areas these are called “socials” or a “stage and doe” or “buck and doe” parties. Usually organised by the bride and her family, guests are charged a ticket price to come to the party, which then includes music, refreshments, games, prize draws, fun and games such as “silent” or “blind” auctions which raise additional cash for the couple.
The Canadian version of a bridal shower is what is known as a “Trousseau Tea”. Although it’s a gathering of the bride’s favorite females (just like that bridal shower), how it differs is that it’s specifically for those favorite females who are unable to come to the wedding or couldn’t be added to the guest list due to limits on number etc. As such, it’s particularly favored by brides who are having a small, intimate wedding as the Trousseau Tea is a chance to spend time with colleagues, neighbors and acquaintances who might otherwise miss the day.
The Trousseau Tea is traditionally held at the bride’s family home and is a very personal gathering because the bride-to-be and her family will spend a little time personally with each guest, making every effort to ensure that the guests gain something of the wedding experience – it’s popular at these events for the bride’s dress and accessories to be laid out for them to see. Although this tradition has had periods of seeming to slide perilously towards being obsolete, in some areas it has seen a recent revival – after all, it’s a chance to get together with girlfriends, eat cake, sweets and pastries and talk about the dress ~ what’s not to love about that?
Of course, depending on the area and influences, prior to the actual wedding a Canadian bride and groom might also enjoy a bridal shower and their respective hen and stag events, to say farewell to freedom!
Canadian Wedding Ceremonies
Canadian weddings don’t see the groom waiting anxiously at the church or venue, hoping his bride will turn up! Instead, it’s custom for the groom and his wedding party to go to the bride’s family home, allowing both parties to get together and “break the ice” before the event. Then, both groups travel to their church or ceremony venue together, just like Armenian couples. This motorcade procession to a Canadian wedding is very much like a Turkish one, with plenty of honking and shouting out of the windows a to alert the whole community to the wedding itself.
The nature of a Canadian ceremony will of course vary depending on the heritage of the couple, the area in which they live and whether it’s a rural, town or city wedding. Some areas have a strong US influence, with wedding ceremonies and receptions taking on a US-like format and schedule, whilst French-Canadian areas, such as Quebec have a distinct Gallic feel to their weddings. Weddings can be church (faith-based) ceremonies or civil ceremonies:
♥ Religious wedding ceremonies, such as the Catholic ceremony can be very long.
♥ Unlike the strictly worded Belgian civil ceremony, Canadian ceremonies can be very diverse, depending on the celebrant. It may be possible to have the ceremony conducted in multiple languages, such as both English and French. Most areas allow the couple the opportunity to include their own words, poems or speeches to one another as part of the ceremony.
♥ One respectful Canadian trend is that when sharing their own thoughts as part of the wedding ceremony (or at the reception if there’s not enough time), the couple might specifically identify other couples attending the wedding who they regard as role models for marriage. The newlyweds might give these couples a special mention to honor their achievement, such as parents who have been married for 30 years, neighbors married 50 years or close friends who’ve just had their first anniversary. This personal touch is fast becoming a new Canadian custom!
The Canadian Wedding Reception
It’s kind of well known that, on any day of the week, the Canadians love a good party. Add into the mix the major celebration factor of a wedding and there’s some serious partying to be done!
As well as eating and drinking, the meal part of the reception will include speeches and toasts. In keeping with Canadian humor, speeches and toasts aren’t just to pay tribute to the happy couple, it’s also game-on for trying to embarrass or tease them! This is very good-natured and affable humor (no outing of awful secrets) and ensures that there are plenty of jokes and lots of laughter both for the bride and groom and for their guests.
The fun and games continue after the eating (but not the drinking) part of the party is over. In one custom, known as the Sock Dance, any unmarried brothers and sisters of the newlyweds should do a silly dance with their shoes off and with silly socks on display – which they’ve put on especially, of course! During this dance, the guests throw money (almost as if these silly siblings were street entertainers) with the cash going to the bride and groom!
Canadians have their own variation on the German Veil Dance, with a popular wedding reception custom known as the Wedding Wheel. The guests create male and female lines and line up, each waiting for a spin around the room with the bride or groom. However, when they get to the front of the line, each guest will pay for the privilege of their dance. At the end of the wedding wheel, the bride and groom then dance with each other ~ free of charge! The custom originated as a way of helping a couple to pay their wedding expenses, but nowadays it generally helps towards honeymoon costs.
Music and dancing may include contemporary options, such as live bands and DJs, although folk bands are often popular, particularly at French-Canadian and Portuguese-Canadian weddings.
It’s common for Canadian wedding parties to continue well into the next day. Usually the couple will have departed at some point to … erm, start their married life! One of the traditional ways for them to exit the party is for all of the guests to line up in two lines facing each other, with the bride and groom at the head of the lines, standing nearest the door. Each line joins hands with the person opposite them, to form an arch, whilst the couple at the farthest end, join hands and run, dance or skip through the arch and take a new place at the top of the line (which moves the bride and groom down the line). When the bride and groom finally get to the end and take their turn, they run up the arch – and then out of the door! After this, their stalwart guests will happily continue the party without them!
Canadian Wedding Clothes
Most Canadian brides will follow the European custom of wearing a white wedding dress. This is particularly important for French-Canadians, who will also want to invoke this custom to reflect their French roots, as the main European trend for wearing a white dress started in France. In some areas of Canada, if ‘s quite customary for the bride to wear an heirloom wedding dress, passed down by her own mother, if this is available.
Unique Traditions
♥ If you’re invited to a Canadian wedding and the words “presentation only” appear in the invitation, it doesn’t mean you’ve got to present a PowerPoint to the assembled company – instead this is a subtle way of letting you know that the wedding gift of choice is money!