The Enneagram of Individuality
Developing ourselves is not an easy process. I’ve identified four key stumbling blocks that get in the way:
1. thinking that it’s not possible for anybody (due to a generally cynical point of view about human nature)
2. thinking it’s not possible for me (because it’s too hard, I’m not good enough, it will create a big ego, etc.)
3. thinking it’s not worth it (because of the belief that it requires unacceptable tradeoffs)
4. having difficulty discriminating what it real vs. false (because of the need for more self- insight)
Notice that three of the four of these stumbling blocks are false beliefs—beliefs that limit us in ways that are totally unnecessary! And the fourth barrier can be surmounted (at least in part) by a knowledge of the enneagram. Anyone reading this article probably already knows about
the enneagram, so that leaves us with the first three barriers: our false and limiting beliefs about ourselves.
Life is not perfect, and neither are we. We may start out as velveteen rabbits, living a life that is not fully real. But do we need to end it that way? Do we need to stay stuffed bunnies forever or can we let ourselves be tempted to imagine something better than that?
We all have it within us to further develop our individuality. And as far as I can see, there’s
no good reason not to. This doesn’t mean becoming an “individualist”—someone who insists on going their own way, damn the consequences. It just means becoming who we really are to the fullest extent possible.
My purpose in proposing an Enneagram of Individuality is to set forth a model that stresses human potential rather than human limitation. By emphasizing individuality—rather than personality pathology—I’m trying to use language to reframe our thinking about ourselves, our potential, and the enneagram. This is not the same thing as asking people to ignore their weak areas or gloss them over. It’s a call to look for ways to transform them or at least lessen their negative impact.
We each have special qualities that are ours alone. And it’s not that hard to rediscover them. We can do it in simple ways—by trying to be present in the moment, by accepting ourselves as we are right now, and by looking for little ways to make life better for ourselves and other people.
Every once and a while, there are bigger challenges that require more fortitude. None of us look forward to these events, but they do become the crucible in which character is forged.
Individuality matters. Why? Because we matter—we are worth developing. We are more than a collection of conditioned impulses, animal instincts, or selfish genes. We are more than an avaricious or defensive ego. We are even more than just a potential candidate for Enlightenment. We are individuals who can develop not just a personality, but a mature personality—a personality with character.