Dear Pim.
I do not want you to be upset by anything that I have said to you. Sometimes I have to say hard things to you, to make you see the reality of the situation sometimes. Sometimes I think you live in fantasy land - but that is OK, we all like to dream sometimes.
In my previous e-mail I tried to get you to understand, that just saying yes without looking at the work involved is not a great idea. You have to plan things, understand things and know the pitfalls of any given situation.
I did not wake up this morning expecting you to be saying 'lets adopt a baby or maybe two' !!! So you took me by surprise.
You know this story, but I will tell you again. Once there was a 15 year old girl who got pregnant and had a baby at 16. She had parents, but the man she had the baby with was married. She made a mistake - the baby was the result. I am sure that she loved the baby, but it would not have been good for her life at the time. At six weeks the baby was given to two people who could not have children. They loved the child like their own flesh and blood. They named the child Richard - me.
What I am saying Pim is I know you want a boy - maybe we will have one and maybe not. Maybe we have a girl, maybe not any child.
I am not a bad man Pim. And maybe this baby boy is fate - it being the same as my own situation.
If you want the boy, then get the boy. I am sure we will love him as our own - the same my parents did me. I will take care of him, if you want me to, if you are working. He would have 2 brothers and 2 sisters he would know.
But if you do it, it must be done right. And that means legally. The biological mother would have no input into the babies life form the day the child is handed over - I am not sure she will understand that at just 15.
I do not know Pim how you know this girl - it seems very odd you say you have no baby and same day you are offered one. Something does not sound right to me. But maybe it is only coincidence I do not know - but not lie to me about it - be honest with me about it.
So, Pim, I leave it to you to decide. I will follow your lead - but that does not mean that I would not want to try for a child of our own. So don't suddenly start taking contraceptives !!!