The biggest realization was that I did not know who I was anymore and always wondered what I was like before I started smoking because the mood swings were getting out of control and alienated all my friends and family. It went to the extent that they were pleading with me to get professional help or start smoking again.
The turning point was when my father died in March of this year. We all loved him and missed him and for some reason I have made peace with my self.
My plan was to use some type of "quit smoking aide" to make it easier. When I started researching I found and was frustrated by the fact that it was just as expensive to purchase these "aides" as it was to continue smoking. More frustrating was that health insurance doesn't cover this either (ironically it would cover medical costs associated with any smoke related disease I may develop?).
In my search I found WhyQuit.com. Thank Goodness!! I began to read, the more I read the more it made sense particularly the part of quitting aides putting you in a state of chronic withdrawal and treating this like the true addiction it is by never taking another puff. Better yet, cold turkey was free! I told myself if I can just get thru the 1st 72hrs nothing could stop me as the physical addiction would be the hardest part. I was tired of being controlled by cigarettes and the psychological addiction I would conquer on my own.