So you left an abusive guy to hook up with another abusive guy, and now you want to marry one of the abusive guys, but you don't love him? Your life is a trainwreck, dear lady. What horror did you experience as a child to make you believe you deserve this? Please, in the name of all that's Holy, don't marry either of these men. Get thee some counseling, pronto -- your life can be so much more fulfilling, so much more serene. There's a wonderful kind and gentle man out there looking everywhere for you, hoping and praying to find you, so that he can treat you with gentleness and kindness, so that he can be thankful to Heaven that you are there in his life to make him the happiest man he knows. That guy can't find you while you're consorting with Neanderthals.