My Dearest Patcharee
You are truly the most special person in the world and I know that you love me but if you truly want to make life easier for me you must promise to forget me and move on. It would give me real pleasure to know that the love we shared will allow you to love someone new even more than you love me. Please use our love to help you grow, to do exciting things, to achieve your ambitions but not to waste time worrying about me.
Next week I will move home and business closer to our workshops where the rent is much less. It is inevitable that I will lose a lot of money because of the problems in Mexico so my next job is to ensure that nobody else suffers because of me. Each day I am in considerable pain so when my business affairs are in order I will face death quietly. I have no wish to become a burden to my friends and when I reach the point where I cannot care for myself I will find a way to end life quickly and peacefully. This is the only medicine I will take so please do not try to send anything to me.
Give your sister my congratulations and tell her that I pray you will follow in her footsteps. Also give my love to all your family, they are truly lovely people. I wish I had met and them much sooner and things could have turned out differently.
As always