Dear James,
I’ve written too many drafts of this already, so I’ve given up trying to use fancy words or half-truths.
Honestly, I’m hurt that you couldn’t bring yourself to talk to me about what happened. I know it was a mistake, but I still consider you my friend and at the very least, I thought we could act like adults. I wanted to apologize but the truth, the whole truth, is that I can’t. I don’t regret it. I’m sorry if this is causing you trouble, but I’m not sorry that we did what we did.
I’m not sorry that I got to feel your perfect body pressed up against mine. I’m not sorry that we kissed and fucked like teenagers, or that I couldn’t control myself once I got my hands on you. I won’t forget what it felt like to be inside you, as close as two people can get, tasting your lust and your pleasure, and making you scream. I won’t deny that it hurt waking up and watching you leave without a word, but I don’t hold it against you.
Because I’ve played my hand. I don’t have to say it graphically; I know you’re smart enough to know what I want. The balls are all in your court, but whatever happens, I pray that at least you’ll let us be what we were before this began.
Regardless of everything, you have brought down my walls and become, without doubt, my closest friend, and I can’t ask for more than whatever you’ll give me. I’m here whatever you decide.
All my love,
Michael’
Dear James,
I’ve written too many drafts of this already, so I’ve given up trying to use fancy words or half-truths.
Honestly, I’m hurt that you couldn’t bring yourself to talk to me about what happened. I know it was a mistake, but I still consider you my friend and at the very least, I thought we could act like adults. I wanted to apologize but the truth, the whole truth, is that I can’t. I don’t regret it. I’m sorry if this is causing you trouble, but I’m not sorry that we did what we did.
I’m not sorry that I got to feel your perfect body pressed up against mine. I’m not sorry that we kissed and fucked like teenagers, or that I couldn’t control myself once I got my hands on you. I won’t forget what it felt like to be inside you, as close as two people can get, tasting your lust and your pleasure, and making you scream. I won’t deny that it hurt waking up and watching you leave without a word, but I don’t hold it against you.
Because I’ve played my hand. I don’t have to say it graphically; I know you’re smart enough to know what I want. The balls are all in your court, but whatever happens, I pray that at least you’ll let us be what we were before this began.
Regardless of everything, you have brought down my walls and become, without doubt, my closest friend, and I can’t ask for more than whatever you’ll give me. I’m here whatever you decide.
All my love,
Michael’
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