If she wanted to be with you, she would. It looks to me like there is too much drama and she isn't going to stop. What I would do is to find someone that would love me without the drama. I know what you mean by loving someone and it hurts. I loved someone 33 years ago and we couldn't be together. I haven't seen him in 32 years. I still love him after all these years and it still hurts sometimes. You seem like a nice person and you can do better. Find someone who will truly love you and only you. Good luck.