So how do you help athletes achieve stable self-confidence and feel competent regardless of whether they win or lose? The answer lies in setting realistic Process and performance goals. Success must be redefined as achieving process standards-following through on a jump shot or making solid contact with the baseball-and exceeding personal performance goals rather than surpassing other competitors. Phil Niekro, the ageless knuckleballer, understood this concept well
I don't try to explain it. Some days I feel like I have great stuff and I get knocked out in the third inning Other days I have lousy stuff before the game, and when I'm pitching I will throw the ball right into the batter's power zone, but the batter pops it up rather than hits a home run. I don't try to work out the problems of winning and losing. I don't have any control over it. (Martens 1987, p. 159)