Sorry friends, but that's all Christian, authoritarian, manipulative bullshit. You've got to get in touch with what your real needs are before you can begin to be of value to others. The other directedness of Americans that is promoted by mom, God, and the flag has pushed us to the precipice of Fascism in this country. We are no longer able to think for ourselves, we think for the "good 'of others." Who am I?', What do I really want out of life? '. These are considered selfish questions. So a whole society goes down the drain. So it is with communes, whose members are too eager to help their curious'brothers, who find it remarkably easy to create all kinds of physical and figurative mess and then leave it for the members to clean up Challenges to this traditional, other-directed. , do-gooder mystique are met with admonitions and scoldings: Why you so the time thinking only about yourself? Do not you have any are selfish, all regard for the rights of others? "(The intent and frequent effect of such a question is to make ot feel guilty and consequently willing to conform to the'altruistic 'wishes of others) And becaus. we have become so confused about what is really important to us as individuals, we believe these admonitions and with good reason. Our demands are indeed'selfish '. As we are no lor capable of knowing who we really are, we are compelled and desire. to be like someone al (everyone) else. We feel we must have money, a new car, power, position, prestige, and an too material sense of personal worth (From Communes USA by Richard Fairfield).