But then something changed…I stopped wining…looked around and realized that I am in a safe place… that mom will come back and kiss me no matter what I have done. This was a moment of pure happiness…not the happiness of getting a new toy…or a dog..a going to the party of your best friend..It was the moment of clarity for me...the first time in my life when I realized that I am happy to have my mom and that I am safe. My eyes saw the world in different shades that moment. And by the way – I was not punished for the curtain… I felt asleep on my mom’s knees.