4) Expect—and even embrace—false starts. Making friends takes effort, and here’s a reality check: you need some failed attempts. Would you expect to marry the first person you ever dated? Not every friendship you attempt will get off the ground, either. It’s not something to take personally; building friendships is a process that takes time, and is in many ways a numbers game. And here’s the beautiful thing about false starts: each and every one gives you a little more insight about how to refine your friend search, and it gets you a little bit closer—time-wise and effort-wise-- to finding a good match.