Thai Culture
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This page is intended as a brief guide to help you avoid the most obvious and common culture gaffes.
One of the most common faux pas committed by foreigners in Thailand is neglecting to remove their shoes when entering people's homes, temples and some shops. It cannot be underestimated how important this is to remember. Always, without fail, you must remove your footwear before entering someone's home and while first time visitors to Thailand may be forgiven for their mistake, it is most certainly frowned upon if you forget this.
Feet
You can't address Thai culture without talking about feet. Your understanding of the way Buddhism and tradition influences Thai thinking is critical to avoid certain faux pas. The degree to which Thai people are influenced by these social norms is varied, but it's best to assume you should follow the advice on this page at all times.
The head is considered to be spiritually above everything else. It is considered very rude to touch someone on the head, where it is believed the soul resides. If you go to a Thai barber of hair dresser, the person touching your head will probably apologise in advance.
Conversely, the feet are considered dirty, profane. You absolutely must not point your feet at images of the Buddha, step over such images, use your feet to point at, or nudge people. If you accidentally touch someone with your feet, don't panic, just apologise with sincerity.
Stepping over people as the sit and eat (Thais often sit on the floor to dine) is very rude indeed. Don't even step over their food. Walk around or wait for them to move.
Never sit with your feet resting up on something else, therefore showing the bottom of your feet to others. This will be exacerbated if you have raised your feet above the heads of others. When visiting temples, do not sit with your feet out in front of you and pointing at Buddhist statues etc, rather, sit with your legs and feet pointing behind you.
Some people may even be offended if you use your feet to touch items associated with the head, such as pillows or hats. Offense may also be caused if you step on coins of banknotes, which have images of the King, a highly revered figure in Thailand.
Without fail, you must remove your footwear before entering someone's home. Thais like to keep their homes clean and unlike westerners, can't stand the idea of dirty shoes being worn indoors. In many places of work and government offices, you will also be required to removes your shoes.
While accidentally using or placing your feet inappropriately will in most cases be forgiven, the potential to cause great offense, and long term misunderstanding, is very real. This section outlines the key caveats.
Humility
Sitting in a branch of Bangkok Bank, I was slouched in the chair, waiting for my wife to finish whatever business she was taking care of. The young male bank clerk who was sorting out some paperwork for us, needed to walk in front of me. In doing so, he made his best effort to lower his head and body as he walked past, smiling meekly at me. The same thing happens at our local Amphur... in fact, pretty much everywhere. Conversely, if I have to walk in front of anyone that is clearly older than me, in a position of authority, or simply someone I want to show my respect for, I always make the effort to lower myself a little as I do so... It's just good manners in Thailand.
Go to an expensive restaurant in North America or the UK and you will most likely be served by staff that exude confidence, almost dominance. In Thailand however, you will be served by staff that appear (to your unaccustomed eyes) to be capitulating to you in such a way that you'd think they were the slaves of the restauranteur. It's just not the case, the staff are just showing you their good manners by serving you in a way that makes you feel special.
This sort of behavior can be a real eye opener for first time visitors to Thailand, especially if you're from a country where everyone is supposed to be considered 'equal'... and something I want to try and address here, because it's a vitally important part of Thai culture that you MUST understand if you are to know what it is to be a well mannered Thai, or to integrate into Thai society.
More recently, I've been living with my elderly mother in law, a person who for whom I have great respect, and we live in a very old fasioned backwater in the far north. She's a deeply traditional Thai woman and many of her old fashioned ways have rubbed off on my wife, who is also ultra traditional. I take great pleasure in showing that respect by humbling myself at appropriate times, e.g. when saying goodbye before going on a long trip, after going home after a long absence... or even just by making the effort to lower my head as I walk past her, if the moment is right...
I've spent many years in Thailand but in many ways, I'm only just beginning to get it. The ability to lower yourself in this way is not actuall