Additional information
Are you currently expecting or do you anticipate adding another child to your home this year (pregnancy or adoption)? Yes. Estimated or actual birth date of the child: September 12, 2015.
Have you ever had live-in childcare before? No
Describe your family's interests. What activities are you involved in? We are a very active household. Kristen has completed 7 marathons, Richard completed his first in January. It is likely both will train for and run another while the aupair is living with us. Kristen also practices Bikram (hot) yoga 3 times a week (90 minutes per class) The kids are also active but we do not have them enrolled in a lot of structured activities. They will hopefully continue taking swimming lessons and Mia has been going to a tumbling class.
Describe a typical weekday in your home (daily routine, schedule, chores, activities) Current typical weekday: 7:00 - 5:00: Kristen's work hours 7:00 - 4:00: Richard's work hours However, we will be coordinating the work hours to ensure the aupair does not work more than 45 hours a week. The kids' schedules: Mon through Fri, 8:30 - 11:00: Ian will go to preschool (aupair to take him) Mon/Wed a.m. ~8:00 - Noon: Mia will go to daycare (we may withdraw her if we are not finding a benefit to continuing), aupair to take her Mon - Fri, all day: Baby with aupair Kids are still napping and typically do so from about 1:30 - 3:30.
Describe a typical weekend in your home. We like to keep our weekends open but wind up usually filling them with activities anyway. Kristen always gets one bikram class in, Richard usually goes for a long training. So we wind up taking turns with the kids in the morning. Those activities are usually done by lunch time. We take them to indoor play parks in the winter and play outside or at parks in the summer. We usually hang out with Kristen's brother who lives across town once a week as well, often on the weekend. On occasion, we take a weekend trip with the kids where the aupair will be welcome to come with us to places like Bend, Seattle or elsewhere.
Describe the frequency and duration of business travel. Both Richard and Kristen travel periodically for work but usually at a rate no more frequently than once every 2-3 months for less than a week per trip. Kristen travels to San Francisco to her company's other office. Richard to various places in the country to visit his various clients. With the baby, Kristen likely will travel much less until baby is at least 1.
Describe the frequency and duration of evening activities that take you outside the home. We try to have as few evening activities as possible. Kristen is gone all day for work so prefers not to be out running around after. Richard is a season ticket holder for the junior hockey league so he may have a game a week to go to. And Kristen's yoga practice demands a fair amount of time - if it can't be worked into the day, she would do this in the evening. Shouldn't be a concern for the aupair, though, (unless she wants to start practicing bikram too!) as Kristen & Richard will work it out.
Describe the relationship you would like to develop with your au pair as host parents. We look forward to making the aupair part of the family. We also want to make sure she has her own personal space. Kristen was a summer nanny for 7 summers and understands the need to take a break from the family, the kids, the parents and the home. We want her to be open with us about any concerns or issues she's having so we can try to address it or work out a mutually acceptable solution. We believe that if our aupair feels she is treated well, she will treat our children well. It is in our and her best interest to make sure communication and trust are strong!
How would you like your au pair to integrate with your family outside of work hours? Consider which activities you would like to share versus times when you would provide your au pair with independent time. Though I imagine we'll somewhat figure these things out as we go along, the aupair will be welcome to join us for a lot of our family activities including weekend activities, trips, etc. However, I know from nannying that sometimes, when you're with the family during off-hours, you still feel responsible to help out. She shouldn't feel obligated to join nor should she be offended if she isn't asked. Both the family and aupair will likely want some space and independence. If the aupair is active and wants to train for a marathon with us or practice bikram yoga with Kristen, she will be more than welcome! She is welcome to have meals with us or go out for family dinners (we don't dine out frequently but we do regularly to take-out)!
What is your communication style as a family? How do you like to resolve challenges and miscommunication? We try to be pretty open. Kristen & Richard have a marriage counselor whom we saw frequently in 2014. Because of it, we have since developed better communication and have a much stronger relationship because of it. We've both learned that it is best to be open with frustrations and concerns rather than not saying anything to avoid a disagreement. We rarely raise our voices at one another and do not curse at one another. We have raised our voices with the children and know (and try) to do a better job of communicating with them more constructively. We do not raise our voices with friends or other family. There should't be too much trouble with miscommunication if both parties are forthcoming with issues. When there is a miscommunication, we're quick to apologize and try to find a way to resolve it.
Describe any limits you might have on your au pair inviting friends, visitors or overnight guests to your home. We want to know who is coming into our home. We worry about bringing people into our home who may want to harm us, our children or our home. We are very welcoming people, though, so don't want to sound paranoid. But It is hard to know, as a parent, who to trust your children with. So generally, we'd like to meet friends and likely will be okay with visitors... but may not ever be comfortable with an overnight guest.
Please outline any curfews or household rules you would like your au pair to follow. Our aupair is an adult. Since we have early work hours, we would expect her to going to bed at a reasonable hour in order to keep up with the demands of caring for the kids the next day. On the weekend, she can do whatever she likes. We'll have a "car curfew" and ask that she let us know where she's going and with whom so we don't worry about her. We have an extra cell phone so we'll give it to her and ask she be responsive if we inquire after her. But our goal isn't to be overbearing host parents. Household rules are to contribute to responsibilities the same as Kristen and Richard do. For example: we'd like her to do her own laundry, contribute to household cleaning (we vacuum, dust, and clean bathrooms at least every other week; we'd also expect she contribute to helping keep the kitchen and living areas clean; etc), keep a tidy bedroom and change her sheets weekly, and generally strive to maintain the same standards Kristen & Richard have. We don't have a pristine house but we do try to keep it clean and tidy. We have a hard time just keeping up with ourselves and our children and would prefer not to have to do so for another person in the house.