Pseudo listening gives the appearance of real listening. Everyone does it at least some of the time. Pseudo listening serves needs that differ from those involved in real listening. You may want to consider which of those needs might be inferring with your ability to listen. Try to honestly evaluate your motivation when talking with the important people in your life. Examine how your particular needs interfere with your ability to listen. To whom do you have the hardest time really listening? Do you always have difficulty listening to this person or only when you are conversing about certain topics? Do the circumstances in which you are talking sometimes alter your motivation, along with your ability to really listen?