TF: And people don’t feel free to say what they want.
JW: Right. You don't say what you want because you don’t want to be seen as
needy. You’re trying to be nonattached. But that is like an unripe fruit trying to
detach itself prematurely from the branch and hurl itself to the ground instead of
gradually ripening to the point where it’s naturally ready to let go.
The question for dharma practitioners is how to ripen so that we become
naturally ready to let go of clinging to self, just as a ripe fruit naturally lets go of
the branch and falls to the ground. Our dharma practices of wisdom and
compassion definitely help with this ripening. But if we’re using our practice to
avoid our feeling life, this will definitely stunt the ripening process, rather than
support it.