The piece of the unhappy memory from the past faced me. I never thought that I would cry because of hopeless love. Then his character full of charm came back to me and smiled like nothing had happened before. He wanted to hold me again and I couldn`t forbid his existence. Warm hands took me into the adorable embrace. Before I had thought that we could love each other. I still loved him but hid my feelings behind the wordless mask.
“My baby”, he said and I couldn`t say that I wouldn`t recognize his soft voice which had made me drop a tear once. His cute lips kissed me on my wet cheek.
“Why did you come back?” I asked quietly.
“Because I belong only to you”, he answered with a child`s humble look in his clear eyes. He held me tightly but balmily. His brown hair touched my light wisps. I could feel hard beat in my chest.
“Leave me alone”, I asked sincerely. But he wasn`t going to leave me in peace.
The rain drops faced our bodies sharply. They drummed the dead ground under our feet. His breath on my neck felt familiar but it exuded wretchedness that I had already experienced. The flood of memory run through me. The gloomy wind blew around the silent land. I forgot the time passing and where I really stood at that moment. His touch was like ghost`s. I sank back into the past, when I thought that I would be loved without hurting myself.
The true story began from the dark day when the cloud of storm was following me without my knowing. The cold city with high skyscrapers had surrounded me. I was alone like every day. I had no family so I escaped from the orphans` home. Rain started just then when I was walking on the empty area. It poured. Humans wandered in the city that had lost its name. I was a lost child. No-one was looking for me. Other children claimed that heart of mine was cursed. They didn`t like me. The raindrops fell on the dark ground. The flowers wilted. I tried to run through the strong rain. Unluckily my shoes` laces were open and I fell down on the wet ground. The mud had smutched my pale face and I started to cry. The pain on the knee stang hardly. Careless humans didn`t even look at me. But then someone crouched to my level and wiped my bitter tears. I ventured to look into young man`s soulful eyes. He was extremely handsome.
“Don`t cry, little lady”, he said.
I couldn`t say anything. Like someone had stopped the time. People around me and the man were ghosts who were on route to death I thought. Like they would change their dreary form. The flood of wind brought the sound of our hearts. We were only living ones. His hand set on my cheek. The special soul was touching me, that cursed child who wasn`t trusted by other humans. Loneliness had arrested her eternality, she thought. But when she felt young man`s touch, her face turn into the red of the forest`s strawberries. He held an ocean blue umbrella in his other hand and took my little hand without knowing who I really was. “Thank you”, I sighed quietly. I was still afraid but when he smiled softly, my heart melted.
“You are welcome”, man answered. “What was the thing that made you cry?”
“I… I fell”, I answered shyly.
“Let me look it”, he said.
Without any words, I lifted the hem of my yellow skirt and showed the knee where the bleeding wound was. Young man looked it with a worry express on his flawless face. Like a gentleman, he teared a piece of his grey suit`s sleeve and rolled it around my hurt knee.
“Does it hurts?” he asked.
“Not as much”, I answered thankfully and looked on the ground. I was still nervous with him. No-one had ever been as kind to me as he had been. The rain finally ended and we stood under the beautiful cherry blossom tree. I didn`t know what to say.
“What`s your name?” he asked.
“Naomi”, I said. “Who are you?”
The man smiled. He was like the sun, as powerful and like he would have a special gift. And he had.
“My name is Suho”, he answered nicely. “I have magic.”
“Really?”
Suho laughed like he had lied to me. He wanted that I would keep my bright smile. He petted my tiny head. I was looking at him deeply.
“Yeah. Water is my element. I am a singer too. I can sing a song for you.”
“For me?”
“The answer is you. My answer is you. I showed you my everything. You are my everything, because I was so sure”, he sang meekly.
Suddenly his hands had changed cold like they had lost a familiar warm. Like the words that were said were meaningless. I lost my fear even if his cold fingers touched my pale skin. His voice was so pure that I couldn`t forget its fountaining beauty. And the voice echoed for the moment in my head but it became remoter a little by little. When I opened my eyes, he was gone and the contiguity of him disappeared. Existence of young singer felt a dream. Before long I noticed that I was standing alone in the rain that dark clouds had brought after his phantasmal leaving. I was the girl in the yellow skirt, red raincoat and too big pink boots. The flower of the cherry blossom three dropped on my tiny hand.
It was a gift – from that mysterious man.
The years passed and I asserted to myself that he would never come back. That it had been just a young girl`s naive imagination`s creation. When the night came and the stars were glimmering on the clear sky, I sat behind my bedroom`s old window with a thought that nothing was going to change. The flower of the cherry blossom three was resting on my palm. The blond hair were draping on my face. The frigid wind blew through my heart and bones. The winter had been cold and long. I had missed something deep in my heart but I couldn`t tell anyone what it was. Even if it was a late night, I didn`t care. I had to go and not listen to the word of my head. I lived alone so nobody was looking for me like always had been. I was free soul who had escaped from the prison of egocentric children. They had hit me and pushed me around. Had thrown the ball on my head that once I was bleeding. I still had the scarf from the past.
I wandered in the careless night. Humans were sleeping. But there were also ones, who were awake. They were celebrating, drinking or hurting others. It didn`t scared me. I had already got hurt. The past was following me – wherever I went. The long blue jacket almost dragged the asphalt under my feet. I thought that nothing would truly happen. There was an owl which fluted in the leafless tree. I was going to across the quiet road but noisy sound made me lift my look on the right side. The black car drove towards me. The bright light blinded my eyes. I stopped. At the last moment I should have tried to run away but I couldn`t move anymore. The sounds around me were changed into silently. I wanted to close eyes and fall asleep like a baby in its cradle. In the moment, I saw a character of him. His eyes looked into mine, but then it disappeared. The car was going to hit me but something pushed me away, on the left edge of the road.
The character was dim in front of my eyes. The heart was beating loudly in my chest.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
Without knowing who he was I grabbed him scarily. I fell into his tender embrace and looked into his dark eyes which told me about the fear. He was there again. With me. Like ten years ago in the rainy city. It started to rain. I couldn`t stop looking at him. The time hadn`t changed his soft face and the sanguine eyes.
“Suho?” I asked.
His palm nestled against my cheek.
“You”, he started carefully. “Is it you the little girl who I met on that day?”
The tears came on my red eyes. Suddenly, I couldn`t answer to him. The heart beat in my chest, forced me to stay without moving. I thought that it had been just a dream.
“You are cute”, he said. “Like ten years ago.”
His touch was magical. I could feel that water was running through my soul and purified it. The blue of ocean waves lived in his eyes. Finally he let his hand go down. The black car that could have hit me, was gone forever. The mysterious driver had driven far away. Everything was my fault. Suho could have hurt himself but there he was – by my side. And the torrent drummed the asphalt.
“Thank you”, I sighed. “I thought that it could be my last moment in this world.”
“You are welcome. I am just wondering why you are wandering outside in the dark night”, Suho answered.
“I… I couldn`t sleep.”
“Well. Me too.”
Silence around us, was hard to understand. Usually there didn`t dominated that kind of silence. It was something that I had missed for a long time.
“You should go back home”, Suho said.
“Why?”
“Don`t you have home?”
“There has never been existence of warm home. Just the emptiness of my heart. No-one has never missed me or even cared. Maybe God created me to be cursed. That meaning of my life is to give misfortune to others.”
“I don`t believe in bad luck”, Suho stated. “There are bad days and good days. Everyone makes mistakes. I will never forget my mistake on the stage. And those others that have shown anger to you have been jealous to your lovable personality.”
I wanted to turn back. He was still standing in front of me. I asked why an earth he wanted to safe life of mine. Perhaps living in the death world, could be better than living in the emptiness. Because then I should feel nothing – no pain, no tears, no anger, no fear. He didn`t know about my past.
“I have to go”, I said.
“I want to sing to you again”, Suho started that I turned around and stopped there where I stood. Tears were hurting my eyes and I tried to swallow the piece that was moving in my throat.