I realized this not long after my kids left for college, when I had the chance to focus on myself — to reflect upon the ways parenting had changed me, and the things I learned. I think you can only really accomplish this properly when you’ve achieved some distance from the role. I’d raise my family differently, not because of the mistakes I made — though I certainly made my share — but because time means so much more to me now. I understand it better, and its importance . . . and the way parents use it, lose track of it, and wish it away. It’s all about the time we spend together as a family, the time parents spend making decisions and avoiding decisions; doing the right thing and the wrong thing; and consoling, teaching, talking, playing, working, dreaming. It all boils down to time.