Santa, if You’re Real, Can You Make These Gaming Wishes Come True?
Dear Santa Claus,
Despite what the title of this letter may suggest, we know you’re not real. After all, I’ve never once received a lump of coal in my overpriced, moth ball scented velvet stocking, even though I’ve been a mild jerk for the duration of my life. Honestly, it’s pretty annoying, considering I have several large locomotives to power, and none of them run on gift cards or festive chocolates, but I digress.
Instead of getting me whatever you were planning on getting me (you know, since I’m an adult and have saved my money responsibly), I’d like you to make these three gaming wishes come true like the bearded genie you are. Save your minions from making one more train set, since nobody likes those anyways, and make the gaming industry a better place, once and for all. All I want for Christmas is:
I’d like to take the time, on behalf of the entire Hardcore Gamer staff, to wish you a Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Festivus, or whatever holiday you hold near and dear to your heart. Though to be fair, if you have a truly horrible holiday experience, we’d probably never know.
Also, if you’re a kid who just found out that Santa wasn’t real through this article, I guess I’m sorry. To be fair, anybody with a mild sense of logistics could understand that a morbidly obese elderly man who probably has arthritis could never fit down your chimney. Also, it’s not 1752, so you probably don’t even have a chimney. Look on the bright side, though, life is going to be full of disappointments, so you’re getting used to this feeling at a young age. Think of this as a learning experience.
Santa, if You’re Real, Can You Make These Gaming Wishes Come True?
Dear Santa Claus,
Despite what the title of this letter may suggest, we know you’re not real. After all, I’ve never once received a lump of coal in my overpriced, moth ball scented velvet stocking, even though I’ve been a mild jerk for the duration of my life. Honestly, it’s pretty annoying, considering I have several large locomotives to power, and none of them run on gift cards or festive chocolates, but I digress.
Instead of getting me whatever you were planning on getting me (you know, since I’m an adult and have saved my money responsibly), I’d like you to make these three gaming wishes come true like the bearded genie you are. Save your minions from making one more train set, since nobody likes those anyways, and make the gaming industry a better place, once and for all. All I want for Christmas is:
I’d like to take the time, on behalf of the entire Hardcore Gamer staff, to wish you a Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy Festivus, or whatever holiday you hold near and dear to your heart. Though to be fair, if you have a truly horrible holiday experience, we’d probably never know.
Also, if you’re a kid who just found out that Santa wasn’t real through this article, I guess I’m sorry. To be fair, anybody with a mild sense of logistics could understand that a morbidly obese elderly man who probably has arthritis could never fit down your chimney. Also, it’s not 1752, so you probably don’t even have a chimney. Look on the bright side, though, life is going to be full of disappointments, so you’re getting used to this feeling at a young age. Think of this as a learning experience.
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