I Hate This Talk Of Money – It All Seems So Shallow
Yes, and for the most part, it is. Sin Sod is largely about face. “Look at my daughter, she went to university and married a good man with a good job”. Or even, “Look at my daughter, she didn’t go to university, but she is so beautiful and hardworking that she married a lovely rich foreign guy”.
As a foreigner, you may feel like you are buying your girlfriend and have become a victim of the old “Thailand ATM” syndrome. And depending on the circumstances, that could be the case. But if you’re in a secure, genuine relationship, you need to forget what the misinformed barstool gossips say and consider your girlfriend and the culture, and yes, she too needs to consider your wallet.
Like it or not, Sin Sod is a big part of Thai culture, and, as soon as a Thai woman announces marriage, the big question on everyone’s lips is, “How much Sin Sod“.
Why? Because Sin Sod is a reflection of her, you, her family and your family. A Thai woman lives to make her family proud, to show the other villagers that they are a good family, that they are to be respected, and that they are on the up, as it were.
But I Am Compromising My Western Marriage Traditions!
I hear you. For example I come from a culture where the woman’s father is supposed to pay all the wedding costs. It’s more a 50-50 thing in the modern day. But think about it like this: Your girlfriend has probably already sacrificed many of her cultural traditions to accommodate you in her life. Living with you and sleeping with you before marriage are two of those sacrifices.
Without you knowing it, she will have been the talk of her village for living with you without being married – this reflects badly on her family. Don’t forget either that you chose her as your girlfriend, and with all due respect, before getting involved with a woman from another culture, you really should understand the culture first.
On an emotional level, you need to consider that just like every Western girl dreams of a white wedding to make her Daddy proud, the majority of Thai women grow up dreaming of marrying in their home town and making their parents proud with a respectable Sin Sod, and in turn elevating the family face.
The way I see it is this: An average wedding in the UK costs 20k, so if you pay 4-6k to marry your Thai girlfriend in a village ceremony that costs no more than 1-2k, you still save a whopping 12k!
That said, in the UK you get gifts and money from your girlfriend’s family, so that offsets some of the cost. Truth is, you aren’t likely to get a bean here unless you marry into a wealthy family, but then setting up home here is cheaper, as is taking care of a woman post-marriage.
Feel free to pitch in with your experience. It would be really useful to know what married guys paid, or didn’t pay, and how the process was handled.
I would like to say a big thanks to Marisa, Noynar and Noi for contributing their cultural knowledge and helping me write this piece.
ฉันเกลียดการพูดคุยนี้เงิน – มันทั้งหมดดูเหมือนตื้นดังนั้นใช่ และ ส่วนใหญ่ ได้ ความบาปสดเป็นส่วนใหญ่เกี่ยวกับหน้า "ดูที่ลูกสาวของฉัน เธอไปมหาวิทยาลัย และการแต่งงานเป็นคนดี มีงานที่ดี" หรือแม้ แต่, "ดูที่ลูกสาวของฉัน เธอไม่ได้ไปมหาวิทยาลัย แต่เธอสวย และทุกที่ที่เธอแต่งงานกับผู้ชายต่างประเทศรวยน่ารัก"เป็นชาวต่างชาติ คุณอาจรู้สึกเหมือนคุณจะซื้อแฟน และได้กลายเป็น เหยื่อของกลุ่มอาการ "เอ็มไทย" เก่า และตามสถานการณ์ ซึ่งอาจเป็นกรณีที่ แต่ถ้าคุณอยู่ในความสัมพันธ์ทาง ของแท้ คุณจำเป็นต้องลืมอะไร gossips misinformed barstool พูด และพิจารณาแฟนและวัฒนธรรม และ ใช่เธอเกินไปต้องพิจารณากระเป๋าสตางค์ของคุณชอบ หรือ ไม่ บาปสดเป็นส่วนใหญ่ของวัฒนธรรมไทย และ เป็นผู้หญิงไทยประกาศแต่งงาน คำถามใหญ่บนริมฝีปากของทุกคน "วิธีการมากสด บาป"ทำไม เพราะบาปสดคือ ภาพสะท้อนของเธอ คุณ ครอบครัวของเธอ และครอบครัว หญิงไทยอยู่จะทำให้ครอบครัวภูมิใจ การที่ชาวบ้านว่า ครอบครัวดี ที่พวกเขาจะได้รับ และพวกเขาอยู่ในสาย were เป็นมันแต่ฉันสูญเสียประเพณีแต่งงานตะวันตกของฉันI hear you. For example I come from a culture where the woman’s father is supposed to pay all the wedding costs. It’s more a 50-50 thing in the modern day. But think about it like this: Your girlfriend has probably already sacrificed many of her cultural traditions to accommodate you in her life. Living with you and sleeping with you before marriage are two of those sacrifices.Without you knowing it, she will have been the talk of her village for living with you without being married – this reflects badly on her family. Don’t forget either that you chose her as your girlfriend, and with all due respect, before getting involved with a woman from another culture, you really should understand the culture first.On an emotional level, you need to consider that just like every Western girl dreams of a white wedding to make her Daddy proud, the majority of Thai women grow up dreaming of marrying in their home town and making their parents proud with a respectable Sin Sod, and in turn elevating the family face.The way I see it is this: An average wedding in the UK costs 20k, so if you pay 4-6k to marry your Thai girlfriend in a village ceremony that costs no more than 1-2k, you still save a whopping 12k!That said, in the UK you get gifts and money from your girlfriend’s family, so that offsets some of the cost. Truth is, you aren’t likely to get a bean here unless you marry into a wealthy family, but then setting up home here is cheaper, as is taking care of a woman post-marriage.Feel free to pitch in with your experience. It would be really useful to know what married guys paid, or didn’t pay, and how the process was handled.I would like to say a big thanks to Marisa, Noynar and Noi for contributing their cultural knowledge and helping me write this piece.
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