Respecting and Keeping Confidences
Are you someone who can be trusted with private and confidential information? To gauge your trustworthiness in this area, ask yourself how likely you would be to share any of the following:
1. You are on a business trip and having some drinks after hours. A colleague overindulges and ends up passing out in the lobby after a series of pretty funny antics. Do you share this story back at the office?
2. A partner decides to go his own way and leaves you hanging. You’ve been through a lot together and have plenty of information that could negatively influence his reputation. Do you leak this information?
3. You and your spouse had a real blowout. Do you vent to your friends?
These situations are examples of implied confidentiality. In each case, no one is explicitly asked not to say anything, but clearly the right thing to do is to keep these things in confidence. There’s quite a bit at stake for the person at the center of each situation. Careers, reputations, and relationships could be irreparably damaged.
Here are a few tips when it comes to keeping confidences:
Never share information that you have been asked to keep confidential.
Use your judgment when it comes to matters of implied confidentiality.
Keep things confidential that were intended to be confidential even if a relationship breaks down.
Do not vent your private marital or relationship issues with your friends. This will cause them to view your spouse or significant other differently, probably negatively.
When someone says, “I was asked to keep this in confidence, but I can share it with you,” let them know that you’d rather not be involved.
The next time you consider sharing information, be sure to ask yourself if there is a chance that the person who shared the information with you would like it kept confidential. If that is the case, don’t share it.