daughter complained to her father about life and how things were so
hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted
to give up. She was tired of struggling. It seemed that as soon as one
problem was solved, a new one arose.
Her father, a chef, took her to the kitchen. He filled three pots with
water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil. In
one he placed carrots, in the second he placed eggs, and the last he
placed ground coffee beans. He let them sit and boil, without saying a
word.
The daughter sucked her teeth and impatiently waited, wondering what he
was doing. In about twenty minutes he turned off the burners. He fished
the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. He pulled the eggs out and
placed them a bowl. Then he ladled the coffee out and placed it in a
bowl. Turning to her he asked. "What do you see?"
"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.
He brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and
noted that they were soft. He then asked her to take an egg and break
it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg.
Finally, he asked her to sip the coffee. She smiled as she tasted its
rich aroma.
She said, "What's the point?"
He explained that each of the items had faced the same adversity -
boiling water - but each reacted differently.
The carrot went in strong and hard. But after being subjected to the
boiling water, it softened and became weak.
The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid
interior. But after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became
hardened.
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the
boiling water, they had changed the water.
"Which are you?" he asked his daughter. "When adversity knocks on your
door, how do you respond? Do you become weak, like a carrot, hard on the
inside, like an egg, or do you change the circumstances, like the coffee beans?"
Lesson: There are different ways to react to hardship. Don't be weak or suppress things - change circumstances from within.
9. Is your jar full?
A Professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front
of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and
empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then
asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
So the Professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the
jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas
between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was
full. They agreed it was.
The Professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of
course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar
was full. The students responded with an unanimous "Yes."
The Professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and
poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty
space between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now," said the Professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - your family, your children, your
health, your friends, your favorite passions - things that if everything
else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house,
your car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff."
"If you put the sand into the jar first", he continued, "there is no room
for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all
your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the
things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are
critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get
medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There
will always be time to clean the house, and fix the disposal. Take care of
the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand."
When he had finished, there was a profound silence. Then one of the
students raised her hand and with a puzzled expression, inquired what the
beer represented.
The Professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no
matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of
beers."
Lesson: When things in your life seem almost to much to handle, when 24 hours in a
day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar......and the beer.
10. Giving blood
Many years ago, when I worked as a transfusion volunteer at Stanford Hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liza who was suffering from a disease and needed blood from her five-year-old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes, I'll do it if it will save Liza."
As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheeks. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away?"
Being young, the boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give her all his blood.
Lesson: True brother love exists.