How does a person determine what is realistically achievable in their life and what is just pure fantasy ? I have one side of me that can see no limits on anything and I want to learn, do and see as much as I possibly can but then I have this side of me that seems to win most of the time. The side that is extremely logical with everything and maybe sometimes a little too careful and not willing to take any big risks. The piece that now determines which side of the scale weighs more are going to be my kids. It's hard to take many chances or risks when I know it will affect my kids greatly. Perhaps living so carefully is not living at all. I can't seem to find the right answer myself. I want for someone to confidently insist that one way is the better way. I struggle too much with the 50/50, good/bad, (yinyang). I know most people will tell me that it's my choice and do what I think is right or whatever but the problem is.... I think so much that both sides have an equal number of bad and good. I want my kids to be happy, to have memories of their father being there for them and not growing up to feel like a broken person...like I do. At the same time I can't see how I can keep going on with life being so unhappy with everything else outside of my kids.