J I love you honey I'm in the hospital I had nobody to get my phone to contact you I've been in the hospital for a little while now honey they say I'll be able to go home soon honey I miss you so much and I love you and I don't know what you think right now but I tried to tell you my health was bad they say it's getting better now it was my heart and my kidneys again but I'm okay now I think I feel good I want to come home they didn't tell me when but they said soon I should be able to come home they came me to monitor for a while this time to make sure everything's okay I've been on machines for the whole time now I'm off the machines and on my own and doing good I can't do video and I can't do phone right now but I want you to know I thought about you very much even being not conscience I thought about you a lot and I miss you so much and I love you I'm so so sorry that I wasn't able to tell you everything and I pray everything will be ok and I pray that you're okay and I hope that you're happy I know you miss me because I miss you so much and I just didn't want you to think that I just didn't talk to you that's not what happened I should be home I don't know when honey but I will try to keep you updated as much as I can I will try to talk to you as much as I can I just hope you know I love you I really truly love you and I really truly miss you with all my heart and soul Jay you know Jay I'm really alone now I live alone I don't have anybody really much to help me I rely on talking to you and I wanted to see you more and I want to be with you more if you don't want to talk to me anymore I would understand but I hope you understand that it wasn't because I didn't want to talk to you but that I've been sick honey they got me this time for as long as I have and want to keep me longer I don't know how long but they said if I really want to go home then I could soon but not yet they didn't tell me when I promise I will let you know I want you to know something Jay I love you I love you with all my heart and soul I miss you I hug and kiss you every night I really do love you and I hope that you're sleeping good right now and I will try to message you again soon okay Buy Buy Baby I love you Jay your mind