Bow, this is your life, not ours. We are not your boss, only advisors who love you. God wants the best for you as we do, but we find that God does not bless us if we do nothing, but does a lot when we take the first step and then the second one. We have a good Thai friend who always wanted to be a flight attendant but never learned hardly any English which is normally required. She is a Christian but for some reason, God has not taught her English by way of his supernatural power. That is the God I know. Moses had to go to Egypt to free his people. God bless