In the spring, Huiling's mother pulled me aside and asked, "What
exactly are your plans with my daughter?" As I had already discussed
marriage with Huiling, my 24-year-old Taiwanese fianc6e, Mrs. Chen's
tone didn't flusterr me. She was just worried that if I, a 29-year-old
American graduate student, didn't have serious marital intentions,2
her family would suffer a great loss of face.3 One point that
infuriateda her was my inability to find amei,ren.