Temple-Thurston offers an exercise to integrate these polarities. It has produced amazing results for me, as well as for my coaching clients. The idea behind it is that by making conscious the ambivalences we have inside ourselves, we can integrate them; this not only relieves our emotional tension around a given issue, but things in our "outer" life end up changing, too. We're no longer stuck in our old, unfulfilling or ineffective patterns, because we're changing our lives from the inside out, not vice versa.