These are all of the headlines that you can expect to see on your feeds while we in the media attempt to reckon with this news:
Calculate how many miles you would need to bike to offset an order of french fries
The McDonald's McBike box targets hipster snake people
McDonald's made a takeout box for my bike, and I'm lovin' it
Is biking while eating french fries going to become the new texting while driving?
This one sales chart tells you everything you need to know about the McDonald’s McBike campaign
McDonald's espouses environmentalism in support of selling a new thing that people use for 10 minutes and throw out
McDonald’s wants to totally thwart my efforts to exercise with this adorable takeout box for my bike
McDonald's McBike is their best idea since McSoup
The McBike is here — and here’s how Apple and Samsung could make it better
According to the McBike promo, only beautiful white people like sustainable energy and an active lifestyle
The 11 most unexpected ways you can repurpose your McBike box
McBike should stay in Europe: not using gasoline to power yourself through a McDonald's drive-thru is un-American
Hands-on with the McBike takeout box — a photo essay
At the very least, this guy seems like he's having a wonderful day: