In many psychological self-help books that are dedicated to helping you overcome “the fear of speaking in public” tell you that, first, you should figure out the exact reason why you feel shy. They ask you, for example, whether you get shy in front of strangers or when trying out a new skill that you haven’t mastered, yet (like a new language). In some of these books, they recommend that you try to identify the thoughts that pass through your head just before you become paralyzed with shyness, and that once you discover the reasons, you tell yourself “I can do it,” or something else that helps you overcome insecurity.